Category: Self-healing

Grow with Life Experiences Series – How to deal with narcissistic people including your parents (Part 2)

On By Jane Huang CoachingIn Awarenss, Emotional health, Healing, Inner Child healing, Mental health, Personal Growth, Self-healing, spiritualityLeave a comment

It is quite unfortunate if one or both of your parents is/are narcissistic however it doesn’t mean you have to repeat your parents’ patterns. When you were young, you brain is not developed enough to process complex emotions and situations. However as you grow more mature especially into adulthood, you have the ability to identify unhealthy patterns inherited from your parents and the capacity to process and heal them. One good thing about being an adult is that you are able to parent your inner child in ways that your narcissistic parent/parents is/are not able to.

Before diving further into how you can heal from the trauma bonding with your narcissistic parents. It’s important to understand the extent narcissistic parents’ negative outlook, criticism, brainwashing and controlling tactics on their children. According to research, children who are brought up by narcissistic parents tend to experience the following mental health, relationship, career and physical health struggles.

It is very important to establish boundaries with narcissistic parents because we are consciously and unconsciously influenced by the environment around us and there is no benefit to have narcissists around you. If you can, it’s best to establish your living space and build a supportive circle around you. Narcissistic parents tend to think they have ownership over their children and therefore they will not respect your boundaries. You establishing your boundaries will actually anger or trigger them because they can no longer control you. It’s important to know that narcissistic people crave power. When their power over something or someone is being challenged, their true color will come out. That’s why narcissistic parents can be emotionally, physically, psychologically, mentally and/ or verbally abusive when their children rebel their ideas, plans or beliefs.

In the previous post, I have mentioned that narcissistic people have no empathy. This means they will not be able to see things from your perspective. They also have no desire to do so. They have this grandiose and arrogant idea about themselves as if they know everything or whatever they say or think is correct and cannot be challenged. Somehow they think they are above others. Even when you show them facts and try to reason with them, their arrogance will dismiss your ideas and proposals. That’s why arrogant people can also be very ignorant because they never see the point of learning from others or life experiences. In their little mind, they think they already know everything. Therefore arrogant people are also emotionally shallow because it is empathy, compassion, humility, the ability to self-reflect that make a person emotionally rich and deep.

It is important to mention that just because you can pinpoint your narcissistic parents’ toxic traits, it does not mean that you can change them. Narcissistic people do not change on the fundamental level. Even if they change, it will be a very small one instead of a drastic change. Narcissistic people are innately self serving, emotionally selfish, cold, immature and shallow. They may change their actions to make them look better but not because they suddenly develop empathy or there is a big change on the core level.

It is much better to look for support and fulfillment elsewhere such as developing meaningful friendships, leaning a new skills, watching some heart-warming movies, engaging in activities that make you feel happier and more confident, being in nature, meditating etc.

Self-love and self-confidence are essential when dealing with narcissistic parents. Always put yourself first. You don’t have to be the one who is always putting in the effort or be consistent with them. You don’t have to give them more than what they deserve even if they are your parents. Parents are supposed to be emotional, psychologically and physically supportive of their children’s growth. If they do not do their part right, you don’t have to be the one putting in all the effort or mending the relationship. It’s important and beneficial to always invest in reciprocative relationships and break the boundaries that your parents set for you and start living your life for your own good. Although it is easier said than done, and it can take years of practicing self-love to hold strong boundaries again narcissistic parents, the rewards and the inner strength and wisdom you have gained along the way will make everything worthwhile. There is nothing more emotionally rewarding than building a strong and healthy relationship with yourself as all other relationships are reflections of that.

Love and light,

Jane

Grow with Life Experiences Series – How to deal with narcissistic people including your parents (Part 1)

On By Jane Huang CoachingIn Emotional health, Healing, love, Mental health, Personal Growth, Self-healing, Self-love, spiritualityLeave a comment

Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (5th ed.; DSM–5; American Psychiatric Association, 2013) defines a narcissistic person as someone who has a pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), an excessive need for admiration, and lack of empathy, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts.

This is indicated by five (or more) of the following:

  1. Has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements). 
  2. Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love. 
  3. Believes that he or she is “special” and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions). 
  4. Requires excessive admiration. 
  5. Has a sense of entitlement (i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations). 
  6. Lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others. 
  7. Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her. 
  8. Shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes.

Warren Buffett said: You can’t make a good deal with a bad person. This is something you need to always remember when dealing with narcissist people including your parents or guardians. However it is not easy to identify a narcissistic person when you first meet them. You may even think they are very charming, agreeable, or even thoughtful and considerate because they are very good at masking themselves to be the person you want them to be so that they can get closer to you and eventually get what they want from you and/ or manipulate you into doing something for them which have been in their mind from the very start.

So it is smart not to be too open towards people when you first meet them because you don’t really know them yet. Not everybody is what they appear to be. It’s like the saying “not all that glitters is gold”. A lot of people unfortunately live from a quite superficial level. Even though it sounds cliché, but it is true that people can only meet you as deeply as they meet themselves. Narcissistic people lack emotional depth and maturity, they don’t have the capacity or desire to understand or experience life from a deeper and more authentic level. To them, they only think about how to get what they want and don’t really care about how their decisions, actions affect other people. So you can also say that narcissist people do not have empathy meaning they can’t sympathize with other people’s pain and therefore they can be physically and/or emotionally cruel. That’s why a lot of narcissistic people are verbally, emotionally and/ or physically abusive. However, these traits may not be apparent until you get to know someone well. So it’s smart and important to be observant and a bit reserved when you meet new people. Those who are respectful of others will respect your boundaries and will be open to you when you are also ready to be open because they are empathetic and do not want to take anything from you. Narcissistic people do not respect other people’s boundaries and when you say no to them, it may even enrage them as if you don’t have a right to choose or say no when you are dealing with them.

Narcissistic people may grow up in families that that are highly traumatic or their parents coddled them when they grew up and never teach them to be responsible for their actions or wrongdoings. That’s why in many male dominant cultures, there are a high percentage of men being narcissistic than women.

However, the level of narcissism is also largely influenced by a person’s own nature. An empath who grew up in a dysfunctional family, was raised by narcissistic parents and is highly traumatized, when given the chance, will still choose the path of honesty, love, compassion, learning to be self-responsible and making sound and good decisions in life. It’s like the story a wounded healer – someone who was deeply wounded, but never gives up on love, goodness and trust in themselves and others because that’s who they truly are. Everyday they choose to open themselves to light, learn to reflect on and learn from their past experiences no matter how difficult it is on some days. Eventually, they heal themselves deeply and profoundly, and therefore, they have and exuberate deep love and understanding for all beings in the universe.

You can also say it’s like a warrior’s journey – a warrior may encounter all types of challenges, monsters or demons, but they never surrender or lose their fighting spirit. They focus on learning the skills and learning from their past experiences and eventually earn the power to outsmart and slay all monsters and demons. Their victory does not depend on external circumstances but the inner light, wisdom, skills and strength that they have learned a long the way.

Empaths who are healed are extremely strong, aware and intelligent because they can perceive people, things and situations deeply and truthfully. They will be able to see and understand things that others cannot. It will be very difficult to fool them because they have learned to listen and understand their intuition and differentiate the voice from their heart from the noise of their mind. The synergy of many deep parts of their psyche make them very intelligent, wise, wholesome, loving, compassionate and strong.

Empaths are on the opposite spectrum of narcissists. They are very sensitive to other people’s emotions and well-being and therefore a lot of them may choose careers such a counselling, spiritual healers, artists or psychics.

When you notice someone who is a narcissist or have narcissistic traits that you feel uncomfortable or that you can’t trust them, it’s important that you establish your boundaries in a smart way. Be nice and polite but do not invest or engage anymore than that. The goodness narcissists share is very superficial and you don’t have to give people more than they deserve especially with narcissists because they are very selfish, manipulative and don’t care about anything else as long as they get what they want. It’s very important to stay cautious around narcissistic people if you have to be around them. If you can, it’s best to distance yourself from them and those who don’t contribute or bring positivity to your life.

Love and light,

Jane

How to create more abundance in your life!

On By Jane Huang CoachingIn Abundance, Goals, Healing, Inner Child healing, law of attraction, love, Love and Relationships, Mental health, Passion, Personal Growth, Releasing negative and painful emotions, Self-healing, self-judgement, Self-love, UncategorizedLeave a comment

Sit in a quite place and breathe in through your nose and breathe out through your mouth until you feel relaxed. Imagine your feet sink deep into the earth and feel the solid nurturing earth energy supporting your whole being .

Place your hands on the centre of your chest and put your attention gently between your hands and the skin of your chest and say “I am my awareness.” If emotions come up, it’s okay. Be with them for a moment. You don’t have to do anything. Be aware of them is enough. They will heal, evolve and expand at the right time.

Now ask to connect with your spiritual guides, archangels, angels or your higher self whoever you connect with usually. If you are new to spirituality, and you are not sure who to connect with, you can always ask to connect with your higher self and your subconscious mind. Spirituality also starts with connecting with yourself first. The deeper you go, the higher you can reach.

Abundance.png 2

Now say in your mind or out loud:

God,  archangels, angels, seraphim, my higher self, my subconscious mind please help me be aware of my negative beliefs about money. Be aware of what thoughts, memories emotions, images, colors etc. show up. Allow your emotions to flow through you. Pay attention if you have any body sensations. Write them down. When you come back and re-read what you have written down, you’ll see how your thoughts, emotions are trying to communicate with you and you will have better connection with yourself and make better decisions in the future.

Now repeat the same exercise  for financial abundance

Pay attention to what financial abundance really feels to you. Be aware of what thoughts, emotions, images, colors etc show up. Pay attention to your body sensations. Do you feel expansion, warmth, or something else and write them down. 

Financial security and abundance is directly connected with your sense of self-worth. How do you see and feel about yourself? Do you really love, value and accept all part of yourself no matter what? You are the only person who can give you the love, the validation, the support you will ever need. The healing process starts and ends with healing your inner child. When you were a child, you depended on your parents. But when you are an adult, you really have to learn to be the divine mother and divine father that inner child needs. You have to be the force in your life to heal, love and appreciate your inner child in all aspects. When you heal your inner child, you really build a strong foundation in yourself, the 3D world and the spiritual world because you have integrated and harmonized all part of yourself and you will be more in peace with yourself. Your emotions will have higher frequency and your desires will manifest more quickly.

Find a quite place to sit and ask you higher self, your subconscious mind and your guides to show you your sense of self-worth. Pay attention to any thoughts, emotions, images, body sensations that come up and write them down. Pay attention to your breathing and become more aware of our own rhythm.

Now you have just released a lot of suppressed energy and emotions that no longer support you. In order for it to manifest more quickly in your life, you need to do come cleaning and organizing. (You can do this on the next day, if you feel you have a lot emotions to process or a lot of thought and feelings to write down in your journal.) Go through your place and clean out all the things that you no longer need. By doing this, you are generate room for new energy to come in and new events to manifest. You will also feel lighter and less dense. Everything is inter-connected. What you do in our physical world affects your mental, emotional and spiritual experience.

Now go back to your desk and write down as much as possible what you are grateful for. The attitude of gratitude will generate positive energy within you and in turn create positive experience in your life. In truth, you can only experience what you are and everything else is merely a mirror for you. I am sure you have heard of the saying “When you change the way you look at something, it changes.” It is because your out experience is a direct reflection of your inner experiences.

inner world

Now that you have done the heard part, finally you can write your goals, your dreams and what you want to experience in your life. I put this part at last is because I want to you experience your heart first and know the difference between your heart and your mind. Your heart’s desires will always fulfill you. By staying in your heart, you will be less sensitive to other people’s judgment, opinions because love the strongest force and protection in the universe. You don’t need other people’s praise to do what you want to accomplish. You only need love to do what you want to do.

Love

Love and peace,

Jane Huang

 

 

Keep your energy and vibration high during COVID-19 lockdown

On By Jane Huang CoachingIn Acceptance, Awarenss, COVID-19 lockdown, Emotional health, Inner Child healing, Mental health, MInd Body and Spirit Connection, Passion, Personal Growth, Releasing negative and painful emotions, Self-healing, Self-love, spiritualityLeave a comment

During this quarantine period, although it is easy to be influenced by negative news and remain in a state of fearfulness,  it is important to fear will never attract or manifest anything positive. It will only attract and manifest more fear. At this time of uncertainty and turbulence, it is crucial that we keep our energy high and vibrant so that negative forces can’t have any grip on us.

Looking from a different angle, being at home is a perfect time to cultivate high, pure light energy within yourself and really strengthen your light body. I have been working meditate light bodyon healing and strengthening my subtle/ energy body for the past two weeks and have released a lot of emotions and become more sensitive and mindful of the health of my subtle body. It has been amazing. I feel more peaceful, grounded and more connected to my being.

 

To help you connect with your spirituality and stay calm and peaceful inside, I have summarized some tips below:

1. Journal before you go to sleep. Write down your desires, fears, worries, confusions and ask either negatives emotions to be cleared during your dream state or answers and solutions regarding your questions be answered in whatever way that is clear to you. JournalWriting down your thoughts and feelings is a great way to clear yourself and let go of your grip on the situation. For any situation to unfold in a positive way, you must detach and let go and allow it to manifest in the way it is meant to be. When you allow and trust, it will always unfold in a way that is for your highest good and you will understand it sooner or later.  

2. Go to sleep with a peaceful mind and open heart. You can achieve this by saying a prayer, meditating, or listening to a peaceful sleep meditation before sleep. The thoughts and feelings you carry into your sleep have profound influence on your inner state. If you take resentful, hateful, angry thoughts with you in your dreams, you will wake up exhausted, depressed, angry, and unfocused. If you go to sleep with a feeling of gratitude, love and peace, you will wake up with more energy, feeling of joy and expansion. Let go of your grip or your perspective on a situation. If someone did something that upset you, just understand, it’s the way they peaceful sleepare, it doesn’t have anything to do with you. They behave in a certain way that they think is most beneficial which you may or may not agree. Repeat to yourself “I forgive you for not being the person I want you to be.” Because in truth, nobody has the obligation to do what pleases you. If you have met someone who is like you and you resonate with, know that this is a blessing and a gift and be grateful for the gift. The attitude of gratitude bring you more of what you love and appreciate.

3. Upon waking, write down your dreams, pay attention to the feelings, colours, messages, the storylines, etc. Sometimes, you may see animals, ETs, or yourself as a different person. No matter how bizarre your dreams are, write down the details as much as possible. When you go back and read your dreams in a month, 3 months, a year, you will see a pattern how your subconscious mind communicates with you and you will start to remember more and more of your dreams. It’s pretty amazing!

4. If something is bothering you, write them down. Writing down your thoughts can really help you sort through your thoughts and emotions. Sometimes, solutions and understanding of a situation can magically appear while you are writing. Pay attention to how you feel and only anchor on positive, assertive and constructive emotions so that your energy/subtle body stays strong.

5. Observe your thoughts and emotions rather than letting them control and affect you. You are much bigger than your thoughts and emotions which are just some aspects of you and they can change constantly. light bodyObserve your thoughts and emotions and let them go. Don’t try to hold on to any of them whether you perceive them as good or bad. Be more fluid, and things in your life will unfold more quickly. That’s why so many people find the famous quote from Bruce Lee “Be like water.” inspiring.

6. Use our time and energy mindfully and choose who you spend your time with consciously. Create an environment for yourself that is nurturing and supportive of who you are and what you want to become. Don’t be afraid to say no. If people don’t respect your choices, they don’t deserve to be in your life. You don’t want to give your precious time and energy to somebody who doesn’t respect you. Do not give up part of yourself just to keep the peace or avoid conflict. Your vibration and the quality of your inner state are your highest priority.

7. Other people are your mirrors. What you like or dislike in a person is a reflection of yourself on some level. Universe gives us challenging situations to help us grow. Challenging situations are perfect opportunities to look within to heal our wounded self and release what is no long needed for our highest good. Everything evolves. Allow yourself evolve naturally and organic without putting external restrictions on yourself. Then you can really witness and be amazed by the grand plan your soul and the divine has for you.  and .

8. Have fun! Laughter is the best medicine. You can heal a lot through laughter and allow your inner child to come out and play. inner childThis is when you are able to reintegrate parts of yourself that have split off during stress times. Healing doesn’t always have to be heavy and challenging. You can heal during deep sleep, watching a movie, playing sports, music, artistic and creative endeavors etc. It important to connect and love your inner child because it is essential in the process of manifestation and your connect to spirit. Once you are able to love and accept all parts of yourself and love your inner child, you will have so much spiritual power, strength, insights and understanding. You will see and understand people and situations so much more clearly that nothing will bother you anymore and you will know exactly what is the right thing to do in every situation.

Love and light,

Jane Huang

Lunar Eclipse on July 27 2018

On By Jane Huang CoachingIn Acceptance, Awarenss, Connecting with emotions, Healing, Personal Growth, Self-healing, spiritualityLeave a comment

The lunar eclipse taking place on July 27 is deeply emotional because lunar is about the Image result for lunar eclipse 2018moon which has to do with your feelings, emotions, intuition, dreams, unconscious memories, things that hiding in the shadow that you are not aware of in the day light. You may start to have more vivid dreams than usual days before and after the lunar eclipse. For people who are sensitive to energy, you may start to feel the shift in you a couple of weeks before it and the effect may last 30 to 90 days to motivate you to make tangibles changes in your life to anchor new ways of beings into your system.

During this period you may become aware of some unhealthy or unbalanced patterns in your work relationships or personal relationImage result for carl jung quotesships. You may want to disconnect with certain people or say no to certain pattern or treatment that you cannot tolerate anymore. Or the process can be completely internal as well, you may just want to change certain habits or a way of being or doing things because they are no longer in alignment with how you want to be and where you want to go in life. It’s beneficial to remember that the universe only takes away what’s no longer working. Even though the changes can make you feel vulnerable, empty or a sense of loss, in your heart you know what is for your highest good. Tune into that higher perspective and truth and trust that whatever you need will be given to you when you are ready. 

It’s normal to feel sad, anxious and vulnerable in times of big changes. Grieve if you need to. Take a kick and boxing class if it helps you to release tension. Don’t try to push away you feelings and pretend they are not there. By acknowledging and accepting everything that you are experiencing  right now is part of the process, you allow true transformations to take place. Then solutions, new possibilities, and better circumstances can come into your life. Life will only give you the same type of challenges Image result for carl jung quotesif you have not learned the lesson. When one situation is not dealt with properly, the next situation you find yourself in tend to be more intense. It’s not meant to be a punishment. It’s just universe’s way to get your attention to look within and figure out what needs to be changed and what is here to keep.

All the strength and wisdom you need to overcome life challenges are inherently within you. So rest assured that all will be okay and be gentle and compassionate with yourself. Whenever you find yourself say I should have done this or that, stop, breathe and say to yourself of course I did that. Of course I feel that way. Of course I said that. These of course allow all part of you to heal and integrate. In truth, you and everyone did what they could at best at that time and in that circumstance. So there is really nothing to criticize. Let go and give yourself the unconditional love that you crave and feel the support that the universe has for you. Let go of  the judgments or rigid ways on thinking about yourself or others.  Relax and try not to be forceful or take risks with things at this time. Instead surrender and allow the divine to present you better circumstances where everything can be resolved peacefully.

Love and light

Jane Huang

If you are going through challenging times…

On By Jane Huang CoachingIn Awarenss, beliefs, Connecting with emotions, fear, Goals, Healing, MInd Body and Spirit Connection, Personal Growth, Self-healing, spiritualityLeave a comment

If you think you are stuck in challenging circumstances right now and there seems to be no way out and you don’t know what to do, take a deep breath and try to be connected with your breath, be centered in your heart and let go of all thoughts for a moment. Deep breath in and out and pay attention to all the sensations in your body. Image result for surrenderTry this for 10 to 20 minutes. Then as you observe your mind and hold the intention in your heart that no matter what happened, there is always a way out or around. Hold sincere and humble intentions for miracles to manifest themselves.

No matter how bad your think the problems are, there are always at least one solution whether you are aware or not. No matter how big the mistakes you have made, Divine love and grace forgives you instantly. And you need to drop the ego or the critical mind and be completely honest and humble about your feelings. Then the mind can be open to be aligned with divine ideas.

If you think you are at plateau in some areas of your life, trust there is always room to grow. There is no limit to spirit. Although for divine ideas to be grounded in your system and to manifest into something tangible,  it may take time and effort, they are great opportunities to learn important lessons such as faith, surrender, trust, flexibility and patience. The more challenging the circumstance, the more important for your life purpose and the greater the lessons. Trust that the divine really only gives you what you can handle. So if you are facing seemingly impossible challenges now, focus on what lessons you are supposed to learn here. What qualities you need to develop to overcome the challenges. Once you get clear mentally and emotionally, action come much easier and desired circumstances can be manifested magically.

For example, in order to run a business well, you may have to learn about building healthy boundaries, trusting yourself and the divine, nurturing your dreams and desires, taking inspired actions, be open to others suggestions and always stay true to what is important and what feels right to you, and taking inspired actions consistently.

To manifest a healthy relationship or to be with the man or woman of your dream, you have to learn about self-love aImage result for learning growingnd self-appreciation, patience, respecting others’ free will, letting go and realizing that you have always been whole, being responsible for your own feelings and emotions, staying true to yourself without denying yourself just because you love someone and taking loving actions no matter how challenging you think it may be and allowing your true self to be seen and not be afraid to be vulnerable.

Whatever the challenges are, don’t run away from them. Face them squarely and walk through them. Have faith that whatever you need will be given at the right time at the right place and you just need to stay open. So it’s a great experience to build trust and connection with the divine and realize that with the divine/God, anything is possible. 

In life, everything is a reflection of yourself.  If you feel life becomes unbearable and all you could do is to bottle down all of your feelings, push them aside and pretend they are not there. Then life challenges will nudge you to be more self-loving and bring your attention to your shadow side which needs healing and nurturing. At this time, it’ll be best to seek professional help instead of attempting to deal with stress, traumas and breakdowns alone. There is nothing weak about asking for help. It actually shows great strengths such as vulnerability and trust and humility. Besides that, we can learn so much by working with others and see things from different perspectives because really it’s all about perspectives.

Further more, it’s very important that you do whatever is necessary to make sure you have a loving and supportive immediate environment.Image result for self love Human being are social beings and you become the people that you spend most time with. So pay attention to how, where and with whom you spend your time, money and energy. It’s not about cutting people out of your life. It’s about being responsible for  your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health and being loving to yourself. Make sure that when you do something, it is because you choose to do it rather than you think you have to do it.

Lastly, don’t be so afraid of life challenges. Divine wouldn’t give you the challenges you are not able to overcome. So rejoice that the divine entrusts you to overcome them. Try to look at external unfavorable circumstances as gifts to help you heal the shadow side of yourself and get clear about what you want in your life. Keep your eyes on the prize and focus on what truly matters. It’s much more rewarding to be an outlier, be on your true path and do what you truly love than going along withImage result for inner outer world the crowd and being hollow inside.

Life is really about learning to connect the inner realm and the outer world and making your heart-based desires your reality. Mistakes and struggles are necessary part of the journey, they teach you so much more about life and yourself. As Jim Rohn said: Don’t wish for less problems, wish for more skills. Don’t wish for less challenges, wish for more wisdom. All relationships and mistakes can be healed and corrected as long as you keep the faith, be open to the wisdom they bring to you and take inspired actions that lift your conscience.

Love and light,

Jane Huang

 

Three Aspects to Permanent Growth in Life

On By Jane Huang CoachingIn Awarenss, beliefs, Connecting with emotions, Healing, love, Love and Relationships, MInd Body and Spirit Connection, Personal Growth, Releasing negative and painful emotions, Self-healing, spiritualityLeave a comment

As you consciously choose to grow spiritually and set the intention be embrace the authentic “you”, you may start to notice your day-to-day choices may be based on a lot of fear based emotions. The activities you consciously or unconsciously engage with may have a lot of addictive nature such as checking emails, messages, reading magazines, tabloids news etc. in order to feel some level of excitement or fulfillment. This type of addition can really disconnect with your inner feelings, intuition and soul wisdom. Ask yourself, are you able to embrace solitude? Do you really treasure the time you spend with yourself? Do you allow yourself to feel and accept your true feelings and hold compassion for them or are you afraid of them and feel the need to run away from them, suppress them or distract yourself by busy doing something?Image result for spiritual growth The external life circumstances are really reflection of your inner world. If you dis-associate with your true feelings and desires internally, you will find it very difficult to stay authentic with the external world too. Before you can truly be vulnerable with yourself, accept yourself for you are right here, right now and love and respect yourself no matter what, you will always feel the need to modify yourself when you meet the outside world, because the way you judge yourself is the way you think the world will judge you.

There are three aspects to self-love which you really master that can tremendously improve the quality your inner and outer experiences.

1) Love:
Love is only thing that is real and is hold everything together. Fear is an illusion created by our ego. That’s why many spiritual teachers define fear as false expectations appearing real. To solve any problem in life, ask yourself “What choices that lead you closer to love and peace?” AImage result for true lovelso love cannot be defined. Everyone experience and express love in different ways. Love is not just a concept. It’s a force but it’s also a feeling. Love is gentle. Love is passionate. Love is creative. Love is courageous. Love heals. Love challenges. Love frees. Love always tell the truth. Spend some time alone and ask yourself, what makes your heart really sing even if nobody knows or sees? What are you naturally drawn to? What would you do if money is not the problem? What would you do if you know anything is possible? Close your eyes and let go all of your thoughts, emotions and preferences and allow the wisdom of your souls to show your true purposes, qualities and paths through gentle knowingness or flashes of insights. To some people, it may come as images or voices that are so distinguishable yet familiar because they resonate with your souls on multi-dimensional levels.

2. Truth

In a world that almost everybody concerns with their outer appearance more than their inner qualities, it can be difficult to see the importance of being truthful and honest. Image result for spiritual truth
However, as you evolve spiritually and desire more love and meaning in your life, you start to see that being completely honest with yourself and accepting life for what it is and trusting the workings of the universe is the only way to stay sane and grounded in this ever-changing world where illusions and duality are the true obstacles that we need to overcome. Spend some time alone and examine exactly how you feel about what you are going through in life. If judgments and self-critical thoughts surface, let go of the thoughts and pay attention to the emotions, feeling or energy beneath them. Breathe deeply in your diaphragm and as you breathe out, set the intention to align your heart, mind and spirit to be one with the ultimate truth and be a channel to allow divine energy wash away all the false beliefs, limiting emotions and feeling etc. that can be let go at this moment. As you keep practice this for at least thirty days, you will start to notice more positivity, clarity, confidence and peace in you

3) Vulnerability/ Humility

Vulnerability and humility go hand in hand. Both are essential to help you open your heart and mind to learn new aspects about yourself, life, Image result for spiritual vulnerabilitylaws of the universe and be flexible and be willing to change. Having the vulnerability to face your fears and the humility to honestly examine your life are essential for deep rooted growth and changes. Vulnerability and humility are also vital in the process of letting go of your personal judgments and releasing the resistance to your truth paths. When you are flow of life, your desires, intentions and longings can be manifested in miraculous ways which take you to wonderful places you have never been to both internally and externally. Vulnerability and humility are both prerequisites and enhancer for experiencing more true love in your life. As you allow yourself to be vulnerable and humble, you consciously accept the enteral oneness that connects all people, things, and experiences. As you consciously integrate this truth and energy into your daily life, you will start to experience more harmony, peace, joy, love and gratitude. You will feel less need for other people’s acceptance and be connected with your true power.

Love and light

Jane Huang

Healing with Sagittarius Full Moon (Part II)

On By Jane Huang CoachingIn Awarenss, beliefs, Healing, MInd Body and Spirit Connection, Personal Growth, Releasing negative and painful emotions, Self-healing, spiritualityLeave a comment

The dynamic and fiery Sagittarius Full moon falls on May 29 in the Northern sphere and May 30 in the Southern Sphere. Its effect usually lasts for 3 days. So anytime between May 29 to June 02 would be a wonderful time to set intention to release what no longer serves you and ask for additional help from the divine to allow the process to be as gentle and pleasant while effective as possible.

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The internal and external shifts you are experiencing are the ways your souls communicate with you to let you know what is coming your way. You may feel confused, worried, upset or excited. It’s going to be a different experience for everyone, but it’s very important for you to stay as grounded as possible. The more grounded you become, the more positive changes and new uplifting energy can be integrated into your body and your life. The deeper you go within and the more reflective you become, the deeper the shifts will be rooted with you. Your system is like a tree, the stronger, deeper the roots are, the higher it can reach.

If you feel there needs to be a shift in perception to allow higher dimension feelings and thoughts to come in, or releasing of suppressed emotions, or letting go of friendships or relationships that are not supportive of where you are going or changing careers or jobs that hold you back from reaching your full potential, set intentions to release them in manageable ways and fully own the decisions and trust that the universe always listens and responds as your true essence/higher self is one with the universe – the divine.  

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The changes you are experiencing now can be sudden or subtle. It can be what you have prayed for or out the blue. However the changes manifest themselves, remember to stay nimble and flexible regarding to your approaches. Purify your intentions and desires so that they are based in love, compassion, humility and service and surrender them fully to the universe and trust that there are great gifts and blessings coming your way. Keep in mind that no matter what we have planed for, the universe always have something better in store for us.

If you feel confused about what choices to make regarding your careers, relationships or even spiritual paths, pause, step back and give yourself space to allow the right answers to come to you when you are in the right frame of mind and your hearts are receptive. It’s okay to slow down, be silent for a while, and stay present in your body to allow yourselves to be receptive to divine ideas.  It’s essential to create a peaceful and loving space within you to allow what is for your highest good to come to you and then you can take it from there. 

 

 

Love and light,

Jane Huang

 

Healing with Sagittarius Full Moon (Part I)

On By Jane Huang CoachingIn Awarenss, beliefs, Connecting with emotions, Healing, MInd Body and Spirit Connection, Personal Growth, Self-healing, spiritualityLeave a comment

Full Moon in Sagittarius takes place on May 29 2018 in the Northern Sphere and May 30 in the Southern Sphere. It’s a dynamic and fiery full moon. Most people feel its effect three days before and after the actual full moon takes place.  So if you experience emotional discomfort or inner turmoil, understand it’s one of the ways that your souls purge and let go of what is outgrown and create space for the new and what is more suitable to support where you are now.

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Holding this awareness in your mind and your heart can really help you stay detached from victim mentality, blame, and other types of drama or power struggles. Truly it is not what happens to you that creates your future, it is your intention and how you respond to circumstances that create your current and future internal and external experiences.  So whenever you feel agitated, upset, or any other negative feelings, consider stopping what you are doing, breathing, and slowing down the rhythm to create a peaceful inner space. Then affirm: Even though I feel ________, I choose to completely love, respect and honor myself. In this way, you make a conscious choice to be more rooted in your true essence and observe emotional disruptions as clouds in the sky which you know will pass at the right time. You never worry about if the Sun will ever come out again. You know that the weather will change and the Sun will eventually come out. The same applies to emotions and physical realities. The law of cause and effect states that everything in the Universe responds to what you think, how you feel, what your true intentions are and what actions you take. So as you shift your inner world, you will see a shift in your outer world as well. As you become more awakened, you will have the increasing awareness that everything is a mirror for us in some way to help me learn and grow and reach our full potential in this physical world.

As a particular emotion surfaces, welcome it like a great friend and just be with it, put your hands over your heart and ask what does this particular emotion needs. It may tell you that it needs more love, more compassion, more connection or more joy or laughter. Learn to trust your inner guidance (it’s usually very gentle, soft, loving and positive) and start to make conscious changes in your thoughts, feelings and behaviours in the direction you desire. Soon you will realize that as you are building a bridge between where you are now and where you would like to be, your physical world also start to shift in the direction you desire.

 

Love and light,

Jane Huang

Heart Always Tells the Truth

On By Jane Huang CoachingIn Acceptance, Awarenss, beliefs, Connecting with emotions, Healing, law of attraction, MInd Body and Spirit Connection, Personal Growth, Self-healing, spiritualityLeave a comment

Have you been spending enough time in solitude lately to connect with the inner well of wisdom that lies in your heart and soul? If you have not, be sure to take some time off and have some alone time to listen to your inner feelings which is attuned to divine guidance and inspiration when you are connected to the field of peace, love, grace, and gratitude.

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You may have questions and concerns regarding to your career, health, romantic life, spiritual understanding etc. No matter what the situation is, it is helpful to be aware that your current circumstance is only temporary and an unlimited number of possibilities exist at this very moment for every situation. Whatever that was manifested in the physical world is just a reflection of your dominant beliefs and feelings. If you want a different result, you will have to change your inner beliefs and heal emotional wounds. It is true that everything is a mirror. Whatever you see in others is a reflection of your own qualities, desires, fears and judgements. That is why for people who have high awareness, life is no long a struggle. It becomes a game because to them everything is a stepping stone to their success. They see themselves as the creators of their life rather than feeling victimized by their current life situations. They take responsibilities for all of their emotions and feelings and are responsible for every result they get in their life. They have the golden touch to turn negative emotions and situations into positive ones because they have the awareness that most people do not have.

However, before you are able to take positive actions to change your life situations and take your life creation into your own hands, there is a very important step that needs to take place first. Without this step, you will not be able to make the right choices and take the right actions when you face challenges – You have to know exactly what your heart wants from a certain situation and be honest about your every feeling regarding to it. It doesn’t matter if others agree because it is not their path, not their life, not their creation. You only need to agree with yourself. Once you deal with any inner conflict, external circumstances are much easier to deal with. 

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Know that very time you overwrite your feelings, the voice of your intuition lowers and you feel less safe and supported in this world. You become doubtful because your mind and your heart are disconnected. The noise in your mind can easily covers the whispers from your soul which always steer you in the right direction. If this feels like you, schedule quiet sometime alone with yourself and conduct some life review or self-reflection session. It will prove to be extremely beneficial both short-term and long-term. It will not only help you make better decisions, but also attract the right kind of people and situations into your life to support your vision and intentions. 

Jane Huang

Love and light